Wednesday, June 25, 2008

Yep, I'm Lopsided

I noticed the other night while I was in bed that I could feel the outline of my protruding right uterus. It was so strange. It felt like the shape it looked like in the pictures from my laparoscopy, only bigger. You can't tell any lopsidedness looking at me, but just for fun I lied down on my bed last night and looked down at my stomach. It's totally lopsided when I do that! My right uterus was completely protruding and obvious. So weird! I don't have a picture, but maybe I'll post one soon.

My belly button is also doing strange things and becoming more spread out and shallow as my skin stretches. I was like, there really is a baby in there!

Here is a picture of me taken yesterday at 19.5 weeks. Forgive my dishevelment. It was at the end of the day. :-)

Tuesday, June 17, 2008

18 Weeks!

I had my bi-weekly cervix check done yesterday and everything looked wonderful! My cervix is holding up at 4 cm. I also had it physically examined and it was strong, firm, closed and holding up just fine. The doctor told me that usually if you are going to have a problem with your cervix, it shows up about this time, so the fact that it looks good is a great thing. However, that doesn't mean it won't still be an issue and I will continue to be monitored frequently.

I really appreciate my doctor because he is no frills. He doesn't scare me to death for no reason, but he also doesn't promise me anything. He just says it like it is. I appreciate that he wasn't like, "You're home free now! Nothing to worry about!" But, at the same time, he was realistic that it was a good thing that everything looked good so far. I think it helps to keep me calm knowing that I will get the bare-bones truth from him. He's been doing this for 25 years and I have complete trust in him -- a good thing, no doubt.

The baby is still head down and had a strong heartbeat in the 150's. I asked him about the likelihood of a c-section and he said it was a strong possibility -- which I know -- but he did say that it's not ruled out that I could have a vaginal delivery. Only time will tell. My prayer has been and continues to be that this baby would come full-term with no signs throughout my pregnancy that I even have a UU.

I've gained 5 pounds so far and just this week my appetite has suddenly exploded. I eat rather voraciously now, which if you know me is not typical. I am a very picky eater and can't eat a lot. I've always been that way, but suddenly I've turned a new leaf. So strange.

I know I keep saying this, but I am so thankful for each day that I am pregnant and still can't believe it. It's so surreal when they put that wand on my stomach and I hear a heartbeat other than mine inside of me. I pray for many of the bloggers I read that are still awaiting their miracles. I know that every child is a miracle and a blessing to their moms, but I'm telling you, there is a totally different joy and appreciation for those of us who have longed and waited for these babies. There just has to be.

Praying for those of you still longing today.

Tuesday, June 3, 2008

Good Little Uterus

My uterus is behaving and my cervix was just fine yesterday. Praise the Lord! The doctor says most cervix issues show up between 16-20 weeks. I will go in 2 weeks for my next check.

Of course I am concerned some days about the "what-ifs", but in spite of that, I have a peace that I cannot explain.

I heard the baby's heartbeat. It was strong and such a great sound. I still can't believe it. I still just can't.

I went to a large-chain maternity clothes store today and while I was checking out, the sales person told me she had been trying for 5 years with one miscarriage. I felt so badly for her and can't even imagine having to work in that environment every day while going through infertility. A strong woman indeed.

Off to get ready for bed for another day at the office.

Sunday, June 1, 2008

16 Weeks

We arrived home from vacation last night. We had a wonderful time. We are probably what you would call active vacationers because we pack a whole lot in in a short amount of time. There is usually little time for lying around.

We went to Long Beach, Laguna Beach, San Diego, the San Diego Zoo, drove to the desert known as Joshua Tree National Park, and Disneyland. Josh also had two business meetings in Los Angeles. I stayed at the hotel and went to Downtown Disney. California is just absolutely breathtaking with so many different landscapes packed into one state.

Josh and I are HUGE Disney fans. We go to Disney World at least once a year. When we lived in Florida, we had season passes. It's an escape for us. It was so much fun to go this time and think that Lord willing, we will get to bring our child the next trip.

I even bought some pictures for the nursery. I haven't bought one thing for the baby yet for fear that something will go wrong, but I am trying to live in the moment and enjoy each day being pregnant. I am tired of living in fear. I can't control the outcome anyway. So you know what? I bought them.

Even more bizarre than me finally buying something for the baby was seeing people look at my belly. I have a belly? I couldn't help but think if any of them were struggling to become pregnant and the mere sight of me tore them to pieces. I wanted to wear a shirt that said, "I took me a LONG time to get here! This tummy was hard won!" Funny how IF will forever make me look at things and people differently.

I have my bi-weekly cervix check tomorrow. I am praying all is well after all the walking and hiking.

requested some belly pictures, so I posted some from our trip. I was almost 16 weeks.